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Displaying all articles tagged:

Relationships

I think my friend is misusing words like ‘accountability’ and ‘harm.’ What should I do?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

I think my friend is misusing words like ‘accountability’ and ‘harm.’ What should I do?

Kai advises a reader who wants to honour her friend’s boundaries—without sacrificing her own

By Kai Cheng Thom
I crossed my partner’s sexual boundaries without even realizing it. What does that make me?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

I crossed my partner’s sexual boundaries without even realizing it. What does that make me?

“Consent has many dimensions, and it can be really helpful to go into detail about what’s going on in any given interaction”

By Kai Cheng Thom
How can I tell my partner that I want more alone time?
Ask Kai: Quickies

How can I tell my partner that I want more alone time?

A tricky question because there could be a lot of other questions behind it

By Xtra Video
Antarctica just had its first gay wedding
Relationships

Antarctica just had its first gay wedding

Stephen Carpenter and Eric Bourne became the first same-sex couple married in British Antarctic territory this past Sunday

By Oliver Haug
How do I know whether my relationship is abusive?
Relationships

How do I know whether my relationship is abusive?

My girlfriend and I are experiencing a lot of high-intensity conflict and anger—which is making me question whether either of us is being abusive

By Kai Cheng Thom
My white friend is calling themselves a ‘shamanic’ healer. Should I tell them to stop?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

My white friend is calling themselves a ‘shamanic’ healer. Should I tell them to stop?

Kai Cheng Thom weighs in on boundaries, cultural appropriation and how we can all grow through conflict

By Kai Cheng Thom
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My girlfriend wants to sleep with her other partners, but not with me—is that selfish?
Love & Sex

My girlfriend wants to sleep with her other partners, but not with me—is that selfish?

Kai advises a reader that relationship anarchy isn’t free from jealousy—or boundaries

By Kai Cheng Thom
My ex-roommate says I’m abusive for leaving my dirty dishes in the sink. Do I owe them accountability?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

My ex-roommate says I’m abusive for leaving my dirty dishes in the sink. Do I owe them accountability?

Non-abusive conflict can still lead to harm. But, Kai says, “taking accountability is not the same thing as giving up your truth”

By Kai Cheng Thom
Valentine’s Day gifts for every queer in your life
Love & Sex

Valentine’s Day gifts for every queer in your life

Shower every love in your life with gifts galore this Valentine’s Day

By S. Bear Bergman
What you need to know about non-monogamy and mental health
Ask an Expert

What you need to know about non-monogamy and mental health

Non-monogamous relationships can come with a set of unique challenges. Here’s how to keep your mental health—and your partnerships—strong

By Diamond Yao
My girlfriend won’t take COVID-19 seriously. What should I do?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

My girlfriend won’t take COVID-19 seriously. What should I do?

Kai weighs in on what to do when your partner is willing to take far more risks than you are

By Kai Cheng Thom
I’m genuinely falling for my new girlfriend—so why can’t I enjoy having sex with her?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

I’m genuinely falling for my new girlfriend—so why can’t I enjoy having sex with her?

A newly-out lesbian questions why she freezes whenever things heat up between her and her partner

By Kai Cheng Thom
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I’m a woman in a relationship with a man. How can I explore my newfound bisexuality?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

I’m a woman in a relationship with a man. How can I explore my newfound bisexuality?

Kai advises a reader who recently came out that there are many ways to build queer community

By Kai Cheng Thom
What does it mean to be a dad, anyway?
Identity

What does it mean to be a dad, anyway?

We spend so much time establishing that transmasculine people can be fathers that we almost never discuss what kind of fathers they might be

By Jude Ellison S. Doyle
My partner and I are vaccinated, but my partner’s parents are not
Ask Kai: Quickies

My partner and I are vaccinated, but my partner’s parents are not

With the Omicron variant and rising Covid-19 cases, should we be cautious about spending the holidays with family members who are unvaccinated?

By Xtra Video
How can I support my friend through addiction without breaking my boundaries?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

How can I support my friend through addiction without breaking my boundaries?

When navigating a loved one’s addiction, giving help that harms us is not really helping anyone.

By Kai Cheng Thom
‘May-December’ age gaps and queer romances
Ask Kai: Quickies

‘May-December’ age gaps and queer romances

I’m 32 years old and my partner is 21 years old. Is it still okay to date?

By Xtra Video
My partner has depression and requires a lot of care. How can I make sure I’m also getting my needs met?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

My partner has depression and requires a lot of care. How can I make sure I’m also getting my needs met?

“Care so often needs to flow in a circle. Sometimes the best way to care for others is to care for ourselves”

By Kai Cheng Thom
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