“I’m just going to go ahead and say, ‘Yes!’” Kai advises. “Go forth, with some caveats.”
Kai Cheng Thom
Kai Cheng Thom is a writer, performer, and social worker who divides her heart between Montreal and Toronto, unceded Indigenous territories. She is the author of the Lambda Award-nominated novel Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars: A Dangerous Trans Girl's Confabulous Memoir (Metonymy Press), as well as the poetry collection a place called No Homeland (Arsenal Pulp Press). Her latest book, Falling Back in Love with Being Human, a collection of letters and poetry, is out now from Penguin Random House Canada.
My friend has been lying about being poor for years. How can I ever trust them again?
Kai advises a reader whose friend bought a house with the help of family money—after spending more than a decade claiming to be working class
Am I a bad person for not wanting to talk about my friend’s dysphoria all the time?
“The mark of a healthy relationship is one that can withstand conflict and challenge, and simultaneously, one where everybody’s boundaries are respected.”
I see myself as different from cis women. Does that make me a ‘bad’ trans woman?
Kai advises a reader that “holding multiple truths is more complex than simply holding all truths to be equal—because not all beliefs are equal in social status and social power”
Is it ever the right choice to ‘cancel’ someone?
We’re heading into murky ethical territory, advice columnist Kai Cheng Thom cautions. But even in the darkest places, there is hope, healing and an abundance of life, in all its messy glory
I think my friend is misusing words like ‘accountability’ and ‘harm.’ What should I do?
Kai advises a reader who wants to honour her friend’s boundaries—without sacrificing her own
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