Kai advises a reader that “holding multiple truths is more complex than simply holding all truths to be equal—because not all beliefs are equal in social status and social power”
Kai Cheng Thom
Kai Cheng Thom is a writer, performer, and social worker who divides her heart between Montreal and Toronto, unceded Indigenous territories. She is the author of the Lambda Award-nominated novel Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars: A Dangerous Trans Girl's Confabulous Memoir (Metonymy Press), as well as the poetry collection a place called No Homeland (Arsenal Pulp Press). Her latest book, Falling Back in Love with Being Human, a collection of letters and poetry, is out now from Penguin Random House Canada.
Is it ever the right choice to ‘cancel’ someone?
We’re heading into murky ethical territory, advice columnist Kai Cheng Thom cautions. But even in the darkest places, there is hope, healing and an abundance of life, in all its messy glory
I think my friend is misusing words like ‘accountability’ and ‘harm.’ What should I do?
Kai advises a reader who wants to honour her friend’s boundaries—without sacrificing her own
I crossed my partner’s sexual boundaries without even realizing it. What does that make me?
“Consent has many dimensions, and it can be really helpful to go into detail about what’s going on in any given interaction”
How do I know whether my relationship is abusive?
My girlfriend and I are experiencing a lot of high-intensity conflict and anger—which is making me question whether either of us is being abusive
My white friend is calling themselves a ‘shamanic’ healer. Should I tell them to stop?
Kai Cheng Thom weighs in on boundaries, cultural appropriation and how we can all grow through conflict