Text isn’t ideal, Kai Cheng advises, but the best type of break-up conversation is one you can actually do
Kai Cheng Thom
Kai Cheng Thom is a writer, performer, and social worker who divides her heart between Montreal and Toronto, unceded Indigenous territories. She is the author of the Lambda Award-nominated novel Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars: A Dangerous Trans Girl's Confabulous Memoir (Metonymy Press), as well as the poetry collection a place called No Homeland (Arsenal Pulp Press). Her latest book, Falling Back in Love with Being Human, a collection of letters and poetry, is out now from Penguin Random House Canada.
I’m a trans man who doesn’t want to transition medically or socially. Am I betraying my community?
Kai advises a reader who feels pressure to stay in the closet
I’m a closeted teen. How do I flirt if I don’t know who’s gay?
“I’m a big fan of just asking questions because that is the way we are most likely to get clear answers,” Kai Cheng advises
My bosses keep misgendering my co-worker. Should I say something?
“It takes a strong soul to correct a person in a position of power—but this is what it means to stand up to injustice.”
How do I clarify if this ambiguous queer hangout is actually a date?
In a shocking turn of events, Kai Cheng Thom suggests you simply ask
My ex says I harmed them. How can I disagree without invalidating their experience?
A reader navigates wanting to challenge a previous partner’s version of events—without turning the conflict into a “he said, she said” situation