Can I text a break-up?

Text isn’t ideal, Kai Cheng advises, but the best type of break-up conversation is one you can actually do

“Do the kind of break-up that you know you can do, one that is clear, that is kind and respectful,” Kai Cheng Thom says. “Whatever you can do to say, ‘I’m breaking up with you, it’s not the best fit, it’s really not about you,’ provided that’s true.

Anything that you can say that is kind, is really helpful.” It’s our latest in the video series “Ask Kai: Quickies,” offering sex and relationship advice for those in a hurry.

Kai Cheng Thom is a writer, performer, and social worker who divides her heart between Montreal and Toronto, unceded Indigenous territories. She is the author of the Lambda Award-nominated novel Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars: A Dangerous Trans Girl's Confabulous Memoir (Metonymy Press), as well as the poetry collection a place called No Homeland (Arsenal Pulp Press). Her latest book, Falling Back in Love with Being Human, a collection of letters and poetry, is out now from Penguin Random House Canada.

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