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Displaying all articles tagged:

Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse was Xtra’s popular advice column by Kai Cheng Thom tackling everything from sex and relationships to mental health. It ran for over four years and was accompanied by the video series Ask Kai: Quickies (formerly known as Quick Tips for the Apocalypse). Kai’s new column is called Dangerous Space, in which she helps you unpack hot-button issues in the news, online and in popular culture—bringing nuance and compassion to conversations that often feel fraught.

I’m starting to date again. How do I have the COVID-19 safety talk?
Ask Kai: Quickies

I’m starting to date again. How do I have the COVID-19 safety talk?

By Xtra Video
We’re a May-December gay couple and our friends think our relationship is problematic and abusive. Are they right?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

We’re a May-December gay couple and our friends think our relationship is problematic and abusive. Are they right?

By Kai Cheng Thom
My partner and I haven’t been having sex since the pandemic started. What can we do?
Ask Kai: Quickies

My partner and I haven’t been having sex since the pandemic started. What can we do?

By Xtra Video
I think I’m asexual but I’m into kinky porn, which my friends say is problematic. Am I a bad person?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

I think I’m asexual but I’m into kinky porn, which my friends say is problematic. Am I a bad person?

By Kai Cheng Thom
I had a breakup just before the pandemic, and I’m having a hard time. What can I do?
Ask Kai: Quickies

I had a breakup just before the pandemic, and I’m having a hard time. What can I do?

By Xtra Video
My genital warts returned and it’s ruined my self-esteem and intimacy with my partner. How do I forgive myself?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

My genital warts returned and it’s ruined my self-esteem and intimacy with my partner. How do I forgive myself?

By Kai Cheng Thom
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I’m a gay sex worker and COVID-19 has affected my income. My friends say I should look for a ‘safer’ job. What should I do?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

I’m a gay sex worker and COVID-19 has affected my income. My friends say I should look for a ‘safer’ job. What should I do?

By Kai Cheng Thom
I’m sad about missing Pride this year. What can I do instead?
Ask Kai: Quickies

I’m sad about missing Pride this year. What can I do instead?

By Xtra Video
Quarantining with my partner made me realize I want to break up. Should I leave or try to save this?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

Quarantining with my partner made me realize I want to break up. Should I leave or try to save this?

By Kai Cheng Thom
How do I talk to my partner about an open relationship?
Ask Kai: Quickies

How do I talk to my partner about an open relationship?

By Xtra Video
I’m a cis guy looking to date a trans woman. How do I start?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

I’m a cis guy looking to date a trans woman. How do I start?

By Kai Cheng Thom
Can I come out to my parents over Zoom?
Ask Kai: Quickies

Can I come out to my parents over Zoom?

By Xtra Video
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I love my boyfriend, but he’s the only guy I’ve slept with. Can I have a ‘slutty phase’ without destroying our relationship?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

I love my boyfriend, but he’s the only guy I’ve slept with. Can I have a ‘slutty phase’ without destroying our relationship?

By Kai Cheng Thom
I’m bored in isolation. Can I have sex with my roommate?
Ask Kai: Quickies

I’m bored in isolation. Can I have sex with my roommate?

By Xtra Video
Sobriety exposed how I treated my past partners. I’m ready to date again, but do I even deserve to find love?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

Sobriety exposed how I treated my past partners. I’m ready to date again, but do I even deserve to find love?

By Kai Cheng Thom
How do I maintain a healthy relationship during a pandemic?
Ask Kai: Quickies

How do I maintain a healthy relationship during a pandemic?

By Xtra Video
My girlfriend and I have an active sex life—but she won’t go down on me. How do I bring this up without shaming her?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

My girlfriend and I have an active sex life—but she won’t go down on me. How do I bring this up without shaming her?

By Kai Cheng Thom
My roommates aren’t physically distancing and I’ve had enough. Should I call the police?
Ask Kai: Advice for the Apocalypse

My roommates aren’t physically distancing and I’ve had enough. Should I call the police?

By Kai Cheng Thom
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