Does being curious about ‘butt stuff’ make me gay?

Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe the real question is, “Why does that matter?”

“Anal play has a really deep and, in some ways, treacherous history. And where I’m coming from today is wanting to be positive toward people of all gender expressions and identities and also particularly toward anal play and not shaming or stigmatizing sex,” says Xtra advice columnist Kai Cheng Thom. “If we take a broad scope of definitions of what is queer and we don’t think that it’s bad or wrong to be queer, then I would just question, ‘Why is butt stuff making us gay even a concern?’”

It’s our latest in the video series “Ask Kai: Quick Tips for the Apocalypse,” offering relationship advice for those in a hurry.

Keep Reading

Remembering barbara findlay

The trailblazing lawyer and activist died on Aug. 22. Her connection to Xtra runs deep

More people in the U.S. identify as LGBTQ+ than ever before

But the Trump administration’s attack on data collection puts demographic information like this at risk in the years to come

What you need to know about Canada’s new LGBTQ2S+ national monument

Called “Thunderhead,” the monument in Ottawa is funded by the LGBT Purge class-action lawsuit

Pride organizers to ‘strengthen’ security following attack in Berlin

Pride organizations in Vancouver, Montreal and Ottawa are assuring patrons they will be able to celebrate safely at upcoming Pride events
Advertisement