Xposed Toronto

Monthly party No No Pony got a Christmas makeover this year, with a special-edition festivus called Ho Ho Pony at The Shop, aka the basement at Parts & Labour. Evan and March are two of the normies who go to this exciting event. Just look at those smiles; you can’t even tell that it’s colder than a witch’s tit outside by those warm mugs.

Johnnie (left) is one of the organizers of No No (Ho Ho) Pony, along with partner Morgan (not pictured). One of the tricks that makes the party fun and campy (for west enders at least) is that they play — and by “they,” I mean Thomas (right) — “Pony” by Ginuwine every hour on the hour as the stuffed pony gets passed around. It’s like a queer-west circle jerk with R&B instead of nut-butter.

Here’s Morgan (left), the second brilliant mind behind No No Pony. Pictured with her is Chiara, in a pretty amazing pair of purple corduroy pants, if I do say so. In fact, Chiara is pretty all-around bangin’. I’ve been known to stare unabashedly at her in Luna, which she sometimes frequents for the servitorial arts.

I really think that 2014 is going to be a ladies’ year. I feel this really strong vagina trend coming on, and like I said in my last column, aren’t we all a little bit over dicks anyway? Don’t get me wrong: I like a poke in the whiskers as much as the next person, but ladies are just getting hotter, it seems; there’s a real lezbionic spotlight that I feel we’re grabbing. Exhibit A: Nithya’s GI Jane haircut and gold-fork-earring combo. Exhibit B: Caitlin’s snap-back-and-tights combo. More and more and more, Becca and I are seeing female talent like this in the room, emerging like Amazons fresh from the hunt. Long live ladies in 2014!

I know we’ve been a bit Beaver-crazy this month, but with talent like this, seriously, how are we supposed to pass this shit up? Lady Regina is on point in this sailor-meets-bar-wench getup for New Year’s at The Beaver, and it only just begins with this ensemble.

It’s been ages since we’ve captured Porcelaine Desire in full paparazzi mode anywhere in town. And here she is, flanked in both mink and blondes at The Beaver’s bar.

Boy Pussy (featured for the first time in the last column), is actually the lovely miss behind these photos. She just had so many good ones to offer up, we couldn’t say no. What Barbi Jo is rocking here is a lot more than an LA-centric bathing suit and some on-point Be-ombré hair; what’s really standing out for me is the look of complete and utter casualness she’s sporting. That Kardashian thing that says, “No big deal, just another moment surrounded by paps taking my snap.”

Another lovely gem from Boy Pussy’s photo arsenal is this one of Demona XXX Mas Deville pressing up so much neon and Chola-attitude I almost fell off my seat when I opened it. The hair, the eyes, that dress. She’s everything Gaga was going for in the “Telephone” video.

And here she is in all her glory: Boy Pussy, flanked by friends and fans Mikayla (left) and Allysin Chaynes on New Year’s at The Beaver. Just more proof that sisters are taking this one this year, even when they’re misters. I can feel the lady energy abound from this column and beyond.

Anna Pournikova’s Xposed appears once a month in Xtra and every two weeks on Daily Xtra.