Thursday, Jan 7
Jax 2.0
Just when I thought I had mastered the art of masturbation, Jax and The Men’s Room come along and says I will blow my mind — as well as my wad. Jax is celebrating two years of bi-monthly stroking; that’s a lot of happy penises and a lot of floor cleaner. Every week, join the stroke-a-thon from 6–9pm, followed by The Men’s Room, where it is bar-men-play time from 9pm-2am. Club 8×6, 1775 Haro St. www.8×6.ca Each event is $10 cover, students and members $5 cover.
Heathers: The Musical
Directed by David C Jones, this outrageous musical has something we can all relate to from our school days. Bullies, bitchy teenage girls, homicidal feelings, coarse language, nudity and two of the hunkiest guys around who spend a good portion of the show in their underwear.. Plays until Saturday, Jan 16. Showtimes start at 7:30pm, with a few matinees available at 2pm. York Theatre, 639 Commercial Dr. Tickets from $25–$40. Info, schedule and tickets at www.thecultch.com
Friday, Jan 8
Bye Bye Showtunes
No matter what you have been told, my singing did not cause this night to end. I sing like I’m 14 and my balls haven’t dropped. The curtain is about to close for the last time on Showtunes at 1181, so get off your butt and come in for your final chance to belt one out. “So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, goodbye.” (Now you will be singing that tune all day.) 6–9pm. 1181, 1181 Davie St. No cover. www.facebook.com/ShowtunesYVR/
Gay Agenda: Tag Team
Admit it: out of everything on this page, “Tag Team” is what caught your eye (I’m just as guilty of it). This is every guy’s fantasy, and who does it better than Peach Cobblah. Not one, but two hotties at a time will strip down to whatever they like. Will they strip themselves or each other? You won’t know unless you go. Maybe if we pray enough, Vancouver’s own Amazing Race pair Ryan Steele and Rob Goddard will pair up. Doors 9pm, show midnight. The Cobalt, 917 Main St. Cover $9. www.facebook.com/events/1619364234983559/
VML Social
I am so tall that it would take two cows to cover me head to toe in leather but I am sure there are a couple in this group that would like to try. If you’re looking for your leather fix, then this is for you. Join in with some old friends or make some new ones at the Vancouver Men In Leather monthly social. 9–12pm. The Pumpjack, 1167 Davie St. No cover before 9pm. www.pumpjackpub.com
Saturday, Jan 9
Rough Trade
Every week, I have at least one event that my friend Syd says is over the top — this is that event. I know for most of you, Crisco is only used for your baking needs, but there are so many more fun ways to use it. As the song goes, “Free your mind and the rest will follow.” So whether you are experienced, curious or just excited at the thought of fisting then tonight is for you. There will be two slings available as well as Crisco, J-Lube and pads provided, but please bring your favorite lubes and toys along. The space will be accommodating for the shy and curious as well. There will be a short education session beginning at 5pm, followed by a Q&A, house rules and lots of fun. Steamworks Baths, 123 W Pender St. Regular rates apply, starting at $16. www.steamworksbaths.com/vancouver/events
Fire & Ice Fetish Ball
The hottest thing I have used during sex was wax. I told my date that I wanted to make a hot wax impression of his butthole. I lit a giant block candle and let the melted wax build up while we fooled around, then bent him in half and just poured it in. I think they heard the screams two blocks over. Tonight, Sin City brings a new theme to the mix, Fire & Ice, with stage performances, fire and ice contact play and more. Plus all the fun of its regular parties. Strict fetish dress code, kink partying on three levels, full size dungeon and more. 9pm–3am. The Hindenburg, 23 WCordova St. Tickets $15 advance at ticketzone.com or $20 at door. www.facebook.com/events/180164752331292
Tuesday, Jan 12
Mpowerment And Chill
Groups like this didn’t exist when I was young and coming out — I just had my nightly trip to the Gandydancer and was taught about sex in stall number three. Mpowerment events are planned by and are for young men who are gay, bi or queer. Tonight, join in and watch episodes of The Outs, a series about two young guys. Afterward, there will be activities to get comfortable, post-film debriefs and snacks. Come, watch, discuss and chill. 6:30–9pm. Mpowerment headquarters, 568 Seymour St. www.youthco.org/mpowerment
Lesbian & Bisexual Women Dating
It was worth getting married just to finally get presents and chocolates for Valentine’s Day, which is fast approaching. That might be too drastic a step for some of you, but for those who want one last stab at a date for this year, give this night a try — this isn’t Christian Mingle. Single ladies will be meeting and mingling with eligible women in a stylish event. Butch, femmes and everything in between will be out in full force. You may find love where you least expect it, and I’ll be waiting for an invite to the wedding. 7:30–9:30pm. 1181, 1181 Davie St. Tickets and registration in advance $40 at www.singleandeligible.com https://www.facebook.com/events/1650322381916907/
Wednesday, Jan 13
Vancouver Men’s Chorus
Do you have aspirations of being centre stage, loved and adored by an enraptured audience? No, I am not listing a porn audition — but there will be a lot of men standing around you. Vancouver Men’s Chorus is having open auditions for the coming year. It’ll be a busy year too, with performances with Chor Leoni, a run of shows called Road Trip, and an actual road trip to Denver for the GALA Choral Festival. Try it out and maybe you’ll uncover a hidden talent. Open rehearsals are every Wednesday at 7:30pm. Vancouver Academy of Music, 1270 Chestnut St. www.vancouvermenschorus.ca
Gay & Bisexual Men Speed Dating
The only time I ever tried speed dating was nothing like the ladies’ version. It was more like how fast you could get the pants off in three minutes. I swear some of them even tried to get off in the same length of time, like it was a premature ejaculation speed date. This, however, is a bit classier — as most things at 1181 are. Get ready to meet a swath of single bachelors and have seven minutes with each one. It’s a great way to meet quality guys in a comfortable, relaxed, atmosphere. And yes, I will be expecting an invitation to these nuptials as well. 7:30–9:30pm. 1181, 1181 Davie St. Advance tickets, $40, and registration at www.singleandeligible.com or www.facebook.com/events/449529328570499/
Lezervations VI
If I had lady parts, I would go to this event just for the name alone. LBTQ women get together for cocktails and dinner at a great restaurant in the heart of Chinatown. Eat, drink and laugh so hard it will feel like an ab workout. This is a quarterly social event to provide opportunities for LBTQ women to make business and personal connections in a comfortable setting. 6:30–9:30pm. Mamie Taylor’s, 251 E Georgia St. Tickets $50 at eventbrite.ca. www.facebook.com/lezervations/?fref=ts
(Think there’s an upcoming event I should attend? Click here to list your event on dailyxtra.com or send me a note at oitc.vancouver@dailyxtra.com.)