More gay sex in the Vatican . . . this time with a sexy Swiss Guard!

Note before you begin reading: I have no idea what the man who has come forward about sexual advances in the Vatican actually looks like, but I suggest you read this story imagining the god pictured above.

A former Swiss Guard, the force of 110 men responsible for the Vatican’s security, has revealed he received 20 “unambiguous requests” for sex from members of the clergy, including cardinals, bishops and priests.

The guard made his claims to newspaper Schweiz am Sonntag, reporting one incident of being called upon in the middle of the night by a senior official who invited him into his room, where he was solicited for sex.

Another alleged incident saw him returning to his room to find a bottle of whiskey with a card left by a bishop inviting him to dinner and saying that the guard would be served as dessert.

A third allegation is that he was fondled by a “high official,” and when he reported the harassment to his superiors received no support.

A Vatican spokesman has dismissed the report as “not credible,” and Urs Breitenmoser, a spokesman for the Swiss Guard, told Schweiz am Sonntag that “the rumour of a homosexual network in the heart of the Vatican was not a problem.”

Agreed, Breitenmoser. Ridiculous uniforms aside, I see no problem in a homosexual network with your guards!

Keep Reading

Illustration featuring a boardgame grid with a ladder, game pieces, a dice and a card with a question mark. Larger blocks feature scenes from the story including a plate of chocolate chip cookies, a burning car, an open door and in the centre, three friends holding each other and facing a rainbow.

After decades of rejection, I found the acceptance I’d been looking for—in friendship

My friends helped me realize I was worthy of the love I’d desperately sought
Two pink figures swimming

I’m fat. My partner is trans. I’ve never felt so understood

Our unruly bodies continue to surprise me in their overlapping struggles
A person with dark hair sits at a laptop with a bowl of sliced fruit and a smartphone around the computer

My queer friends taught me to say ‘I love you.’ Now I say it as often as I can

My family showed love through action, but my friends helped me learn to say it out loud
Illustration of a person with their head in their hands, sitting on a bed. A trail of smoke rises from their head and transforms into a deer, jumping towards another person who is kneeling with their arms outstretched, in front of tall blades of grass and flowers.

Loving my partner is easy. Finding the courage to stay feels harder

Our decade together has helped me see myself as capable of change, rather than as always looking for a way out
Advertisement