Dolly Parton made music, but she also made family. And now she’s gone.

The world lost a legend today, as news broke that country singer, superstar and legend in the truest sense of the word, Dolly Parton, passed away at the age of 80.

Parton’s career spanned six decades and included 50 studio albums. She’s one of the bestselling musicians of all time and a cultural icon whose work spanned film, theatre, TV and even theme parks. Songs like “Jolene,” “I Will Always Love You” and “9 to 5” were not simply hits but cross-generational cornerstones of popular culture.

That’s all the run-of-the-mill biography stuff, and Parton’s contributions will be memorialized in the days and weeks to come. Flags will be flown at half-mast, and the lights from Nashville to Stonewall will be dimmed in memoriam. Writers will reflect on what Parton and her music meant to them and the culture, the influence she had and how irreplaceable she truly is.

But her queer fans will particularly mourn a lifelong ally and advocate.

There are some public figures who occupy a special place for the gays. Parton was one of those, an endless source of inspiration for drag queens and queers of all kinds over the decades. Her public image—bleach-blond hair and massive breasts right until the end—was drag unto itself, and in a 2022 interview, she recalled how it’s an attempt to make her outside match her inside.

“I just like to look the way I look. I’m so outgoing inside in my personality, that I need the way I look to match all of that,” she told People.

Her earnest independence, challenging of gender stereotypes and refusal to apologize for being herself was an inspiration. Parton always treated her queer fans with warmth and welcome, even when queer acceptance was less mainstream. In 1985, Andy Warhol photographed her with artist Keith Haring at film producer Sandy Gallin’s home in Beverly Hills.

“We are heartbroken by Dolly’s passing,” Human Rights Campaign president Kelley Robinson said in a statement following the singer’s death. “She showed the world what it looks like to lead with love and stood with our community long before others in entertainment, using her voice and platform to create a world where LGBTQ+ people feel seen and celebrated.”

Her allyship and support has continued into the present day. Parton was specifically asked about her stance on anti-trans legislation in her home state of Nashville by The Hollywood Reporter in 2023.

“I’ve got transgender people. I’ve got gays. I’ve got lesbians. I’ve got drunks. I’ve got drug addicts—all within my own family,” she said. “I know and love them all, and I do not judge.

“And I just see how broken-hearted they get over certain things and I know how real they are. I know how important this is to them. That’s who they are. They cannot help that any more than I can help being Dolly Parton, you know, the way people know me. If there’s something to be judged, that is God’s business. But we are all God’s children and how we are is who we are.”

That’s who Parton was—loving us all and not judging.

At my very queer wedding last week, in the wee hours of the night, we danced to my favourite Parton song, “Potential New Boyfriend.” Where the much more famous “Jolene” is a track full of fervour and bitter jealousy, “Potential New Boyfriend” takes on similar themes in a much more light and airy way. A dance-pop banger, it was one of Parton’s first songs to really break out of the country sphere on the mainstream charts.

It’s decidedly silly in the way that only Dolly can be, as Parton’s narrator spars with another woman over a man who could one day be her boyfriend. The accompanying music video, one of Parton’s first, is pure ’80s in the best way.

The joy I felt surrounded by my chosen family in that moment, shout-singing at one another about keeping our hands off a potential new boyfriend as my wife and I celebrated our new love, takes on new colours with Parton’s death. She gave us many gifts, but joy and family—no matter your stripes—is one of the greatest.

I’ve thought a lot in the past year about the death of Parton’s longtime husband Carl Dean in 2025 and how she spoke about him. Their partnership and devotion is a model we should all aspire to in all of our lives and relationships, and its six-decade longevity is a manifestation of the love Parton brought to everything she did.

In a video announcing her passing, Parton’s nephew Bryan Seaver assured the world she will always be part of our families.

“My family and I have shared a lifetime of beautiful memories with Dolly, but so have you,” he said. “She has always been on your television, your record player, your CD and on your phone playlist, becoming an extended part of your family, whether you liked it or not.”

Though most of us never got to meet her, in her music and her presence, Dolly Parton made us all feel like part of her chosen family. And that’s a gift that will last forever.