How can I ask for what I want in bed?

“Great question,” Kai Cheng Thom responds to a reader. “If you figure it out, let me know” 

Kai Cheng Thom takes on a question a lot of us have struggled with: what do you do if you know what kind of sex you want, but you just don’t know how to ask for it? 

“You watch a movie or a porno and they’re just somehow doing everything that the other person seems to want them to do and it’s amazing, and that’s just not how it works in real life,” Kai says. “Explicitness is really key.”

It’s our latest in the video series “Ask Kai: Quick Tips for the Apocalypse,” offering relationship advice for those in a hurry. 

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