Sure, we still have a little over a week before the finale of RuPaul’s Drag Race All-Stars arrives, but over the past weekend, the good people at Logo have been slowly leaking the cast list for Season 5 bit by bit over various social networking sites. The theme this year is Goddess, apparently (not to be confused with Charlie Sheen’s live-in call girls), and after slowly trickling the names one by one over the past three days, here’s the official, full cast list for Season 5:
Alaska Thunderfuck
Jesus, it’s about time. After trying out five seasons in a row, Alaska has finally found her way on to Drag Race. She’s got a killer sense of humour, and her boyfriend, Sharon Needles, proved that America is open to a campy, punk-rock queen, but therein lies her biggest liability: will she be able to differentiate herself from Sharon?
Alyssa Edwards
Okay, admittedly the poor girl needs to lay off the tanning beds before she goes full-blown George Hamilton, but as a former Miss Gay America 2010, she does have a pretty impressive pedigree behind her. Unfortunately, she was also stripped of her title after breaking a(n admittedly arbitrary) rule, and if last season’s dismissal of Willam proved anything, it’s that Ru does not take kindly to rule breakers. Oh well. Her title subsequently went to her runner-up, Coco Montrese, but what are the odds she’s also on this season?
Coco Montrese
Turns out, those odds are pretty high. Yes, in an inspired bit of awkwardness, Alyssa’s replacement for Miss Gay America 2010 will be competing on Season 5 with her, which I’m sure won’t result in a lot of bitching and cat-fighting, right? . . . Right? (It will.)
Detox Icunt
Whether or not Logo and OUTtv will be able to air her full name has yet to be seen — if you don’t get the joke, sound it very slowly — but regardless, good on her for finally getting her shot at the crown. She’s a fixture in the SoCal drag community and knows how to play to the camera, so chances are she’ll go pretty far.
Honey Mahogany
Honey is a more classic queen, in the sense that she doesn’t just lip sync, but also performs live. Honey also marks the first time a San Francisco queen has made it on to the show, so hopefully, everyone will cut it out with the claims of an East Coast versus West Coast rivalry. (Fun fact: drag is the new gangsta rap.)
Ivy Winters
Weird little factoid here: there are two queens on this season of Drag Race that share their names with pornstars. This is why you have to Google your drag/porn names before you commit to them, people. Regardless, she’s super fishy and has cheekbones I would die for.
Jade Jolie
This is the second queen who also shares her name with a pornstar. I have no idea if this is going to be the hot new thing, but whatever. Like Ivy, she’s sickeningly gorgeous and looks like she operates on a diet of nothing but oxygen and celery.
Jinkx Monsoon
There’s something about Jinkx that reads similar to Tammie Brown, and that can be both a good thing and a bad thing: chances are, she’ll be a pretty memorable contestant, but the odds of her wackiness getting the best of her don’t bode too well for her.
Lineysha Sparx
It’s the Puerto Rican queen! Yay! Apparently, she’s drag sisters with Season 2’s Jessica Wild, which means that she’ll probably be one of the more likeable queens, although her language skills may be an impediment.
Monica Beverly Hillz
This one is sort of like Kenya Michaels, in that she’s super fishy even out of drag and weighs roughly 60 pounds soaking wet. Hopefully, she’ll avoid that most deadly of trappings: resting on pretty.
Penny Tration
Penny’s inclusion on the show isn’t really a huge surprise, since she won the fan vote to compete earlier this year. Despite the fact that the past two seasons have both had three big girls each, she’s the only plus-size queen in this season’s cast, and she’s also the oldest queen. If she can use that to her advantage the way Latrice did, she stands a good chance of winning.
Roxxxy Andrews
You could argue Roxxxy is a big girl, since she was crowned Miss Continental Plus 2010. But she did lose a fuck-load of weight, so the “big girl” thing is pretty debatable. As far as I can tell, she’s talented, she’s got the gift of gab, and she has an impressive family pedigree behind her, so right now, I consider her the one to beat. (Also, she is super cute as a boy.)
Serena ChaCha
I’m on the fence about Serena: on one hand, she’s a gorgeous queen, but there’s something about her look that makes me think . . . vacant. I think it’s the way she paints herself, but I’m going to worry about Serena.
Vivienne Pinay
From what I’ve seen, Vivienne is drawing a lot of comparisons to Jujubee, and considering how popular she is and how well she’s been doing on the show, I can’t say that this is really a bad thing. But like Alaska, she’ll need to shake off those comparisons if she wants to live.
So who looks like they’ll be taking the crown? Right now, I’m putting my money on Alaska, Roxxxy and Detox, but considering my picks for Season 3 were Sharon Needles, Alissa Summers and LaShauwn Beyond, clearly I have a habit of betting on the wrong horses.
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