The new “Transformers” movie is a hit but star Megan Fox has upset the Canadian Free Press with her “mean-spirited” attack on the “white trash, hillbilly, anti-gay, super bible-beating people of Middle America.” Yikes, this might become a Perez–Hilton-sized scandal unless I defuse it here with a simple photo:
Ms. Fox, you see, has breasts. Nice ones, in fact, and — while I’m no anthropologist — I have learned that conservative straight men really, really like them.
Consider Republican South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford, who abandoned his family and his job to spend days with his Argentinian girlfriend and (as described in his embarrassingly leaked email) her magnificent pair:
“I love the curves of your hips, the erotic beauty of you holding
yourself (or two magnificent parts of yourself) in the faded glow of
night’s light…”
Sexytime!!! Now why is everyone making fun of this man who played hooky? Because, once again, while it’s none of our business if Sanford cheats on his wife, it is when he then covers for it by attacking Bill Clinton and voting against the civil rights of gay people:
It was gay people who threatened Sanford’s marriage, not gorgeous Latin American tits. Riiiiiight.
Conservative attacks on gay rights are finally beginning to fall short for one simple reason: after so many examples of right-wing sex scandals, the public knows (okay, the smart public knows) that these shrieking moral guardians are completely full of shit: