If LGBTQ2S+ advocates want to fight for greater acceptance of trans and non-binary youth, they will need to focus on winning over parents, according to a new report.
Nearly two-thirds of Americans (62 percent) who know someone who is gay, lesbian or bisexual would be comfortable if their own children came out as queer, according to survey data released by The Trevor Project on April 7. Only half of the 2,210 respondents, however, said they would be okay with their children identifying as trans or non-binary.
On the bright side, almost three-quarters of all adults (72 percent) polled in the survey expressed confidence they have the capacity to better understand and support their children if they were to come out as trans or non-binary. Fewer than one in five respondents said they would not be comfortable at all if their child came out as trans (18 percent) or non-binary (16 percent), suggesting that a minority of parents would be categorically unaccepting of their child’s trans identity.
Pronouns remain a stumbling block to acceptance. Fewer than half of adults surveyed (49 percent) would be comfortable if their child started using they/them pronouns, while nearly one in five (19 percent) said they would not be comfortable at all. Adults already familiar with gender-neutral pronouns generally were more open to the prospect of their child using they/them pronouns.
The Trevor Project’s survey suggests that more must be done to educate parents about the LGBTQ2S+ community. Those who weren’t aware of gender-neutral pronouns were more than twice as likely to say they lacked confidence in their ability to understand and support their trans or non-binary child.
“I think that the most important thing we can do is talk to our kids, whether they are cisgender or transgender, whether they are LGBT or straight. They need to know that what is happening in the country right now is wrong and that they are worthy of love and support.”
In a statement, Sam Ames, director of advocacy and government affairs for The Trevor Project, said that the findings “underscore how badly trans and nonbinary voices are needed in media and in statehouses across the country.” Around a dozen U.S. states have enacted laws targeting LGBTQ2S+ people in 2022, such as those restricting the ability of trans youth to access gender-affirming medical care or join school sports teams in alignment with their gender identity.
Ames says it’s critical that parents in the U.S. explain to their children what is behind this unprecedented wave of anti-trans sentiment.
“I think that the most important thing we can do is talk to our kids, whether they are cisgender or transgender, whether they are LGBT or straight,” they say in a phone interview with Xtra. “They need to know that what is happening in the country right now is wrong and that they are worthy of love and support.”
In just the past month, Arizona, Oklahoma and Utah have all enacted anti-trans sports bans, while Kentucky and Indiana could soon follow as lawmakers weigh overriding the vetoes of their respective governors. Alabama became the first state to make prescribing treatments like hormone replacement therapy (HRT) and puberty blockers to trans minors a felony, while Arizona outlawed gender-affirming surgery for trans youth.
The Trevor Project’s own research shows that these measures are extremely harmful to the mental health and overall well-being of LGBTQ2S+ youth. Having at least one accepting adult in their life can reduce the risk of a suicide attempt among LGBTQ2S+ young people by 40 percent, while youth who report high levels of social support from family and friends are significantly less likely to attempt suicide.
“We know how powerful a factor acceptance is in the lives of LGBTQ+ youth,” Ames says. “The truth is, that’s not unique to LGBTQ+ youth. Good parenting is about love and acceptance and support. Our research shows that LGBTQ+ youth who report feeling supported and accepted by the adults in their lives have significantly lower odds of attempting suicide. And what we try really hard to remind people is, that’s true for all youth. All kids deserve acceptance. All kids deserve support.”
Although the organization’s latest report finds that more work needs to be done to ensure all LGBTQ2S+ youth have the support they need, Ames says the findings ultimately leave him “feeling hopeful.”
“The group of dogmatists and the demagogues is actually a very small group of politicians pushing these bills,” they say. “Some of them genuinely believe that they can write us out of existence. Some of them are using this as a political wedge issue, something that they have identified as really powerful in a heated election season. This is going to impact the mental health and risk of some of the most marginalized and vulnerable youth among us.
“We have to put that in a political context,” Ames adds. “This is the worst kind of politics, this is the kind of politics that assumes unacceptable risk of casualties.”
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