What’s love got to do with it?

According to this, it’s all in the throat:

Spotty internet connections has left me so #$%ing angry (I’ve lost today’s posting twice) that I’m just going to post this small bit iand then my print column for out of Vancouverers, instead of a longer blog entry.

*This column has my picks for WinterPRIDE this weekend, if you’re still looking for something to do in Whistler. Thanks for your patience.

Photo by Tallulah!

Caption: Me and Tommy D: red carpet shenanigans

Cocked
& Loaded

Somewhere between all those Yes-We-Cantinis
and that time Aretha Franklin mistook a giant bedazzled bow for a fancy hat, I discovered
that the best kind of smile you can witness firsthand is the grimacing half-smile
that people use to hide their disbelief and/or use to mask their complete and
utter disgust.

Which is why I decided to celebrate the
grand opening of new Davie Street nightclub—Pulse—by doing what I do best:
getting groped by a complete stranger and having it photographed for all to see
in Xtra.

Come on. We’ve all been there. Ask any
professional partier. I’m sure they’d tell you that the only true way to make

an entrance at a VIP event is on your back.

This sets a precedence and, like a firm
handshake, let’s the other party goers know that you mean business.

Okay, okay, I admit that I was lying about
the “complete stranger” bit above.

The saucy minx rolling around on the carpet
with me is Tommy Delicious, the Director of Marketing and Promotions for Pulse.
It may have taken a couple Yes-We-Cantinis, but he and I both wanted to
demonstrate why red carpet canoodling is one of the favourite pastimes for most
of Hollywood’s favourite celebritramps.

You’ll have to ask me in person whether
Tommy D was wearing underwear. These lips are sealed (contrary to popular
opinion, I know, but I’m not lying this time).

As for the new club, gone is the fireplace
and dusky décor of the old Majestic. Here to stay is a sleek uber-modern take
on an intimate night club space, complete with brushed-steel everything, a
dancing cage above the main bar, a new DJ booth and walls of your favourite

liquor.

To put it simply: if you like the Meat
Packing District in New York, you’ll like the new Pulse.

“I think Vancouver needs a place where
everyone can go,” Tommy D explains. “Inclusivity not exclusivity. That’s the
key to Pulse.”

The various VIPs in attendance agreed that
the transition from the Majestic into Pulse was a positive one.

“It mixes something new with classic Davie
Street,” says WinterPRIDE Chief Operating Officer Ken Coolen.

His business partner and WinterPRIDE Chief Executive
Officer Dean Nelson, agrees: “The new Pulse is hot. It’s very Vegas. Clean with
a sophisticated twist. I love it.”

West End Business Improvement Association president
Robert Graham believes the opening of another gay night space on Davie Street
is a win for the community.

“It’s important to have another really good
gay club in the community,” Graham says. “It’s important for the queer
community to have choices.”

There are a couple of huge things happening
in Vancouver and Lower Mainland right now. The Vancouver’s Next Gay Top Model
2009 competition started on January 18 and will be taking place in and around
the city until the finale on April 2.

I am one of the judges for this year’s
competition. Come meet the contestants and I at Score on THU JAN 29 for Gay Top Model Sports Night. Check www.gaytopmodel.com for more information.
Check www.xtra.ca/blog/vancouver
regularly for contest updates.

Running
SUN FEB 1 – SUN FEB 8, WinterPRIDE
is one of the biggest winter Pride festivals in North America. I’ll be covering
the festival for Xtra! West, so next week’s Cocked & Loaded will be a
Whistler feature.

Here are the WinterPRIDE events I will be
covering – check www.gaywhistler.com
for event times and addresses:

On THU
FEB 6, join the Mr. Gay World contestants for a tour of the Peak 2 Peak
Gondola ride followed by special lunch at Christines. Later that evening, make
sure to catch the United Colours of
WinterPRIDE Fashion Show and watch the contestants take the cat walk.

It’s an annual tradition. On FRI FEB 6 come to the Roundhouse Lodge
for the MountainTOP Party. Afterwards,
I’ll be heading to Celebrities on the
Mountain (produced in partnership by Celebrities Night Club). There is also
the Pampered Pussy Party (ladies,
don’t miss this one) and the Furrocious Party for anyone looking
to get down and dirty.

On SAT FEB 8, catch the Mr. Gay World Grand Finale and then
come finish your WinterPRIDE experience at the Snowball. Word of mouth on this one is hot Hot HOT. Do not miss
out.

Check www.xtra.ca/blog/vancouver every Friday for updates
to Abtastic 2009, an online photo diary of Sean Horlor’s quest for washboard
abs.