Remember when romantic comedies were actually good? Me neither. Probably because Julia Roberts killed the genre back in 1990 when she convinced everyone that having an annoying laugh and a giant, bottomless mouth were legitimate substitutes for relatable characters. (No, seriously. Watch any Julia Roberts movie and take a shot every time she throws her Pez-dispenser-like head back and goes “HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” You will die of alcohol poisoning.) But thanks to the internet, we’ve successfully distilled every crappy rom-com from the past 20 years down to one essential plot device: well-written, believable protagonists who connect on an emotional level with the audience MAKE THE WOMAN FALL DOWN HERPDY DERP. Remember, ladies: no man wants to marry a beautiful, smart, sane woman! Clearly, they want to bang crazy, dumb trolls or something. Thanks, Hollywood!
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