We’ve all tried finding the perfect hangover cure. For some it’s a bloody caesar for breakfast; for others, it’s something deep-fried and smothered in cheese. But a new company is claiming to have created the official “magic” hangover cure, fittingly in the form of a shot.
Forgiven is an “alcohol metabolizer” that helps your body process the booze in your system — meaning you’re less likely to be hung over in the morning. Its directions are simple: before you stumble into bed after a night of binge drinking, you simply shake the bottle and chug the shot. And then, apparently, you wake up hangover free.
This promise sounded a little too good to be true, so I decided to put Forgiven to the test.
Naturally, I called up my best fag-hag and we hit the town . . . and boy did it hit back. It’s not clear when too much became too much, but it was somewhere between when the server, who was a “three” at best, suddenly became a “10” — and when we started loudly reciting lines from the drag documentary Paris Is Burning as if others would know what we were talking about (“Butch queen! Butch queen!”).
After the struggle of getting home, my friend passed out on the couch and I opened up a bottle of Forgiven. It comes in several different flavours and each is characterized by a strong taste and smell of vitamins. It sticks in your nose and mouth. Despite this off-putting smell, I took the shot and went to bed.
The taste was still very prevalent the next day, and my first thought after waking up was, “Ugh, what a gross taste in my mouth.” It is important to note that this was my first thought and not, “Why did I drink so much?” Because, while feeling a mild headache, it was nowhere near as crippling as it should have been. I was neither sick nor dizzy and found myself feeling as though I had only slept poorly, rather than indulged in a night filled with rum, whiskey sours and nachos.
I decided to try it again. I once again had too much to drink — this time at a family dinner when I had a particularly early morning scheduled for the next day. I woke up with a bad wine headache, blurred vision and a foggy mind. In early-morning desperation, I reached for a bottle of Forgiven, which should have been taken before going to bed.
But even though I didn’t follow the proper directions, I still found shortly after taking the shot that the mental cobwebs started to clear and the headache once again took its place at the back of my mind. The taste was as bad as my previous drunken stupour.
In summary, I’m likening Forgiven to Buckley’s cough medicine — it tastes awful, but it works. If you don’t mind smelling like vitamins for a day or two (this includes all bodily functions), then Forgiven is an excellent product for getting you on your feet in the morning after a binge.
The shot is incredibly cheap: it costs just $3. It can be purchased at 7/11 and on Forgiven’s website. Forgiven is also available in pill form, which might be a bit easier to swallow than the shot.
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