Joe Simpson insists he’s not gay; no one believes him

Rumours are rife that the reason Ashlee and Jessica Simpson’s parents, Joe and Tina, are getting divorced is because Joe, a former Baptist minister, likes him some twink hole.

It all started when the National Enquirer reported that Joe was getting it on with 21-year-old wannabe model Bryce Chandler Hill and that Tina had found photos from a “private photo shoot” between Joe and Bryce in their home. Once the story broke it wasn’t long before male escort Joey Anderson was dishing about his own liaison with the Simpson patriarch:

Over the course of two hours or so, we rolled around, kissed and gave each other oral. We’d take breathers and then start up all over again. He seemed to have an insatiable appetite for sex and never really appeared tired. I’m probably not the only one. After being a family man, and a religious one to boot, for all these years, I’m sure he’s out sowing his wild oats with a bunch of boys. Joe has lived a lifetime of deceit regarding his sexuality. Before the dust settles, I wouldn’t be surprised to hear about a lot more guys coming forward.

TMZ is reporting that Joe has been telling friends and confidants that the rumours about his sexuality are “ridiculous” and “not true.” TMZ then asked their readers to decide themselves by featuring an “Is Joe Simpson Gay?” voting box with a yes or no option.

The poll results show that there have been more than 100,000 votes, and 87 percent think that only a gay would match his bleach out with his sweater and shoes. Of course, they’re forgetting one very important fact: Joe is southern. He’s not wearing that yellow from head to foot because he thinks it’s fashionable, but just so that when he dribbles grits all over himself no one notices.

Keep Reading

Jimmy Heagarty

‘Big Brother 27’ star Jimmy Heagerty is making for great TV. It could be even better with more queer people

By very virtue of their sexuality, queer houseguests cannot have the same experience as their straight competitors

‘RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars 10’ delivers a wildly entertaining finale—after a waste-of-time semifinals

It’s hard to figure out just what producers were thinking with this merge format
Andrea Gibson, left, and Megan Falley, the subjects of the film "Come See Me in the Good Light," pose for a portrait during the Sundance Film Festival on Saturday, Jan. 25, 2025, in Park City, Utah.

Andrea Gibson helped me see life in the good light

Gibson’s poetry about queerness and mortality taught thousands of people how to reject apathy and embrace life
Collage of greyscale photos of a sofa, chair, shelf and the lower bodies of two people, against a purple and pink background

We need queer gathering spaces more than ever

The 11-part series “Taking Space” explores where we go next as the lights of gay bars dim