Fiona Forbes, Joan-E, Mary Zilba and Raziel Reid at the 19th annual Art for Life auction. Photo: Victor Bearpark

Alright, you gold-digging bitches, if you missed the 19th annual Art for Life auction, you missed all the sugar daddies! There was $150,000 worth of art up for bidding by Vancouver’s finest. By which I mean richest.

CBC Studio 40 was filled with high society in black tie. I fit right in as a starving artist who is literally starving. (Best.Diet.Ever.) I was insecure for a minute, before I remembered the power of blonde. I think of her as a superhero. Marilyn Monroe in a spandex onesie with a big B on her chest, coming to a theatre near you. I was only in the studio for less than a minute when a rich old man introduced himself to me, and because he was wearing a YSL suit, I let him buy me a drink.

As a friend said to me later in the bathroom, “Aw, your first sugar daddy!”

“Honey,” I told him, arching my eyebrow, “I lived in New York City for three years . . .”

“I know,” he laughed. “I meant of the evening!”

For my complete review of Art for Life, check out Blitz & Shitz in the next issue of Xtra, available Nov 28.