Who’s been a good boy?

Christmas is a-cummin’ — what to get for the boy who has everything?

As Rascal: A Toy Story begins, new Channel 1 Releasing discovery Drake Riley drops into a West Hollywood sex shop searching for a great new toy to play with and chooses… the Blake Riley Vibrating Ass.

The what, now?

Well, you know how they make fake dicks that vibrate while you stick them up your departments? That seemed a little one-sided, so after years of research and development we can now play with a rubber ass.

Fuck it whenever you want, feel it humming and churning around your stiffy, and no need to cuddle after.

The perfect first choice model for this unique device was Blake Riley, one of Channel 1’s biggest stars and finest rumps.

So Drake takes “Blake” home and begins jerking off through his red mesh jockstrap while fingering the receptive rubber orifice. And as he plays, he fantasizes that the real Blake Riley comes to life and joins the fun.

What makes this extra freaky is that Drake and Blake look almost identical (hence the names). They could easily pass for twins, and here they are well and truly doing it.

I guess the idea is that it’s close enough to being brothers to be totally perverted, while still leaving enough wiggle room that those who can’t handle the idea can convince themselves they’re not brothers (because, well, they’re not).

Meanwhile, people who aren’t bothered in the first place can just enjoy two scorchingly hot young guys sucking, rimming and slam-bang fucking.

At one point, Blake actually penetrates his own ass — the rubber one, anyway — which has got to be some kind of first.

The flesh-toned toy is so realistic that when Blake pushes his hard dick in without a condom, I was about to get all uppity and reactionary before I realised he was fucking the fake.

That I’ve spent almost the whole column talking about one scene doesn’t detract from the rest of the film. Six other sexy guys also dive into the toybox to see what they can find, from tiny “training kit” buttplugs and cockrings (stunners Rod Daily and Johnny Hazzard) all the way up to gigantic rectum-ruining dildos (Jeremy Bilding and the remarkably capable Jackson Lawless).

Yeah, the whole movie is basically there to advertise Channel 1’s sex toy line, but can you imagine anything better under your tree?