Apparently, the gods of Hollywood (Xenu, I think?) are smiling down on us because there are going to be two, count ‘em, TWO movies starring the super-sexy Marvel heroes Thor and Captain America. But how do you decide which one is better? Sure, some people would point to things like plot structure or well-defined characters, but those people are pussies. No, the only true way to judge the merits of a superhero movie is by how bangable the hero is. Take Iron Man for example. Amazing movie. Robert Downey Jr? Dirty sexiness on a platter. Compare that to, say, Ben Affleck in Daredevil, and we start to see a very loosely conceived pattern with no real base of support. I’m lazy like that. Anyway, it’s time to decide: who’d you rather?
Thor?
… or Captain America?