What’s your queer IQ?

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Pride festivities should not just be about wearing fabulous new outfits or having sex with as many people as possible. This time of year should also be a time to reflect on our history and the evolution of our rights movement. How gay are you?

1. Gore Vidal is:

a) A famous horror-movie star

b) A brilliant American author

c) A hair stylist to the rich and famous

d) A villain in a James Bond movie

2. Fan literature that imagines Star Trek characters Kirk and Spock having sex is known as:

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a) Slash fiction

b) Vulcan porn

c) William Shatner’s diaries

d) The Final Frontier

3. Tyler Brûlé is:

a) A special dessert served in the fanciest restaurants

b) A cocktail invented in Las Vegas

c) An editor of magazines about unnecessary stuff

d) Mary Tyler Moore’s cousin

4. The play that first made Brad Fraser famous is:

a) The Ugly Man

b) Escape from Alberta: The Musical

c) Unidentified Human Remains and the True Nature of Love

d) Chainsaw Love

5. The pop singer who once held a press conference for the sole purpose of stating that he was not gay is:

a) Michael Jackson

b) Boy George

c) Prince

d) Fabian

6. The filmmaker who once declared homosexuality “the love that won’t shut up” is:

a) Woody Allen

b) Todd Solondz

c) John Waters

d) Mike Nichols

7. The first province to include gay and lesbian rights in its provincial human-rights act was:

a) Alberta

b) Ontario

c) Quebec

d) PEI

8. The pop culture figure Conservative minister John Baird most identifies with is:

a) Chief Wiggum

b) Ned Beatty, in Deliverance

c) Doris Day, in Pillow Talk

d) We don’t know — he won’t grant us an interview

9. The rock star who has never claimed bisexuality is:

a) Madonna

b) David Bowie

c) Elton John

d) Ted Nugent

10. The gay icon who famously declared that Hollywood would not exist without gays and Jews is:

a) Debbie Reynolds

b) Elizabeth Taylor

c) Cher

d) Judy Garland

11. Canadian filmmaker Paul Haggis recently left the Church of Scientology because:

a) He found Tom Cruise too annoying

b) He has two lesbian daughters and was offended by the church’s stance on California’s Prop 8

c) He liked the idea of being a Mormon, instead

d) John Travolta asked him out on a date

12. When the article “Men Loving Boys Loving Men,” about intergenerational relationships, first appeared in Xtra’s predecessor, The Body Politic, it caused a huge uproar. The Toronto journalist who wrote it is:

a) Andrew Coyne

b) Irshad Manji

c) Gerald Hannon

d) David Frum

13. The kd in kd lang stands for:

a) Kraft Dinner, the singer’s favourite dish

b) Kant and Descartes, lang’s primary philosophical influences

c) Kathryn Dawn

d) Keep Dancing

14. Politician Glen Murray was the mayor of:

a) Tel Aviv

b) Winnipeg

c) Edmonton

d) Kansas

15. Queen Victoria famously left lesbians out of the anti-homosexual law because, she argued:

a) Some of her best friends were lesbians

b) She could not imagine two women having sex

c) She was convinced they wouldn’t frighten the horses

d) Her favourite singer was Dusty Springfield

16. The woman who has not slept with Warren Beatty (yet) is:

a) Madonna

b) Joan Collins

c) Diane Keaton

d) Lady Gaga

17. The famous gay artist who featured ultra-masculine, muscled-up men in his drawings is:

a) Fred of Norway

b) Tom of Finland

c) Bob of Barcelona

d) Leonardo da Vinci

18. Toronto filmmaker John Greyson won a best-picture Genie for:

a) Zero Patience

b) Lilies

c) Urinal

d) War and Peace

19. The hugely controversial organization that the late poet Allen Ginsberg was a member of and advocate for is:

a) PETA

b) Communist Party of America

c) NAMBLA

d) The Freemasons

20. Britney Spears is popular with some gay men because:

a) She’s a raging whore, so they identify with her

b) She’s dim, so she reminds them of their beloved household pets

c) She tongued Madonna on live television

d) Hey, every minority group screws up sometimes

How did you score?

17-20: You are so gay! Don’t worry about wearing pink or lavender; you’re already a dead giveaway.

13-16: Not bad. You need to bone up on your queer facts, though.

8-12: A bit soft. You definitely need some hardening up.

4-7: Get back to the queer books, and keep reading.

3-0: Straight (to hell).