Okay, okay! The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo actually looks pretty awesome

I know admitting this is the equivalent of setting fire to my credibility as a bibliophile, but I’ve never read any of Stieg Larsson’s Millenium series. Wait, wait, wait! Before you tie me to the stake and burn me by using copies of Dan Brown’s latest crime against the written word, hear me out. I missed it back when everyone was initially getting into it, and by the time I started getting details, I was pretty much the only person in the world who hadn’t read it. At that point, it’s better not to show up to the party than to show up late and annoy everyone. Plus, it contains a lot of… well, let’s just say, “questionable relations” and leave it at that. Needless to say, it’s not something your 12-year-old can write a book report on.

But lo and behold, I can finally have my cake and eat it too. The trailer for the American film adaptation of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo just leaked and… yes, it looks amazing. Ridiculously so. Let’s break this one down, shall we?

First: David Fincher is directing it, and you can kind of see shades of Fight Club in it. I think we can all agree that was around the time Brad Pitt was at his hottest.

Second: Rooney Mara and Daniel Craig are both fine actors. Rooney establishes herself as a talented up-and-coming actor, and Craig looks like this:

’Ello, guv’nah.

Third: that song in the background? It’s Karen O and Trent Reznor’s cover of “Immigrant Song.” Remember that episode of South Park where the boys discovered a frequency that makes people crap their pants? Well, I think we’ve just discovered the frequency that causes people to have violent, earth-shattering orgasms of the auditory canal.

Anyway, I haven’t read the books or seen the original movies based on them (I’m sure they’re all lovely too… or not – whichever side the majority agrees with), so what I’m about to say is based entirely on this one little trailer. This movie looks pretty rad.

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