Holiday songs for people who don’t like holiday songs, #1

“I wish I had a river I could skate away on . . .”

It’s that time of year. When you wish you could drive a stake into the ear of whoever thought playing holiday tunes in November is a good idea. When you start to resent every single store for ruining childhood nostalgia because they’re overplaying Vince Guaraldi’s Charlie Brown Christmas album. When you think it’s wrong that people are covering Christmas songs that appeared in the ‘90s. I’m looking at you, Glee . . .

But there is a remedy to all of this.

Yes, the song mentions Christmas, with the opening bars referencing “Jingle Bells,” but it evokes a desire to forget the world, the noise, everything, and just skate away. The song has been covered by everyone from Beth Orton to Sarah McLachlan and even Robert Downey Jr. Christ, even Glee made one good choice by covering it in the holiday special. Just goes to show: not every holiday song has to be cheery and perfect. Thank fuck.

Journalist, writer, blogger, producer.

Keep Reading

A cartoon of two people standing close together; one is holding a puppy, the other is holding a book

How a Canadian kids’ book became the centre of a U.S. Supreme Court case

“Pride Puppy” was written to highlight the joy of Pride. It became a political flashpoint
A cartoon of people raising their fists with police officers facing them. There are flowers in the background

Queer censorship isn’t new in Canada, but we’ve won the fight before

Key figures from censorship fights in the 20th century reflect on what we can learn from them today
A cartoon of a nondescript personified animal riding a horse

Trans Albertans are strong. We aren’t going anywhere

Trans Albertans reflect on what makes their home province special, even in the wake of Premier Danielle Smith’s legislative attacks and book restrictions
A cartoon of two racoons looking at a laptop

Online censorship is crushing indie webcomics

From social media platforms to payment processors, new restrictions are making it harder for webcomic artists to exist
Advertisement